There’s no denying that the common male has a lust for violence in their videogames. Politicians and psychotic self-absorbed pricks like Jack Thompson may tell you that videogames are "evil" for embracing the violent nature of man, but what they cannot do is change this characteristic of human nature. Fortunately for those who crave to spill the blood of their virtual enemies, games like Oblivion exist that allow them to participate in acts of violence that wouldn’t be accepted in real-life aside from international warfare, with the peak of this violence encountered within Oblivion’s gladiator arena.

Since I was restricted from pursuing into the Gates of Oblivion, preventing me from delving further into the game’s plot, I spent a good amount of time in the gladiator arena, moving through the ranks as I took on combatant after combatant as the crowd roared and the arena announcer spoke of my victories.

In the training facility beneath the arena I met my fellow warriors, champions who I would soon meet in battle when I had risen high enough in the ranks. One of them just so happened to be the arena champion, a human/orc half-breed, who’s name escapes me at the current time. Despite being one ugly mother ****er, he seemed to be a pretty decent guy, and all he wanted to know is his past, and about his parents, in particular his father. So he gives me this key and tell me to visit some town up in the mountains. So, what the hell... that’s what I do.

I arrive at this town, which just so happens to look like practically every other s***hole mountain town in the game, and enter yet another underground labyrinth filled with rats and orcs who turn invisible. Whatever, they’re just fodder to me since I’ve killed enough wild animals that my heavy weaponry and armor stats have increased enough to be a murderous sword-wielding figure of death. So, I make my way to this door, which is unlocked now because I have that key, and I make my way to what seems to be the den of someone living in the deepest part of the labyrinth. It’s fairly well lit and you can see furniture. including bookshelves and chairs, off in the distance. I go ahead a little bit further and some shirtless nut just comes running towards me and proceeds to wail his arms like he’s going to hurt someone. Well, that someone wasn’t going to be me and so I made quick work of him. What I soon realized was that this shirtless maniac was the champion gladiator’s father, and upon further inspection, reading his diaries, it became clear that this man was a vampire. Yes, a vampire. And seeing how vampires are always cool, this can’t be anything but a good thing. So, I make my way back to the central city and as a reward I supposedly get a few sparring lessons -- which you really don’t. The game just pretends to give you some but no interaction is done by you, the player. To say the least, this was a completely unrewarding side-quest and I just hope that the majority of the others aren’t as un-fulfilling.

After this little sidequest, I came back to the arena to compete in some battles. While the experience wasn’t as enjoyable as I thought, it’s still a pretty neat little side-quest that is sure to let some folk burn some time with the game. The first few opponents are pretty easy, since they can easily be defeated with a sword, by blocking their attacks or hiding behind one of the many pillars if they’re using a bow and arrow to attack you with. You’ll move up in the ranks from "Pit Dog" to "Brawler" after three victories. After that the difficulty revs up as I took on two elven women who proceed to tear my ass apart with ease. One was launching some arrows in my direction while the other would chase me and attempt to hack me to pieces. I retried the event a number of times over but before I knew it, my time with Oblivion had been up and it was time to go home.

Final instalment coming in a few...